A Prideless Man Read online

  “Wednesday?” The sheriff frowned, mulling it over so much like a ponderous bear James stifled a laugh. Fuck, he was cute.

  “Yes, Wednesday. Unless you have something else scheduled?” He tried to hide his disappointment, not wanting to appear needy.

  “Why can’t you have lunch with me today?”

  Relief shot through him so fast he almost lost his grip on the cane. “I’d love to, but I’m going to be busy today and tomorrow. Wednesday is the earliest I can do.”

  A cold light entered the shifter’s eyes. “Who are you seeing?”

  “What?” How had he lost control of this conversation? “I’m not seeing anyone else, I just can’t see you.”

  “Why?”

  He didn’t want to tell the sheriff about his meds. He wasn’t completely certain they were legal. Who knew what his father put in the stuff? However, the few times he tried to live without them led to black outs and screaming migraines for weeks after. He still didn’t recall an entire month during his fifteenth summer, the beginning and end of his rebellious period, until now.

  After his father scared off another shifter friend of James’ a month ago, he stopped stomaching his father’s rhetoric against shifters, packed up his stuff, and moved away.

  He still contacted his father by email and phone. James didn’t have it in him to completely cut off the man who single-handedly raised him. Although hiding in a town of shape shifters was the perfect location. His father would never step foot in this town. Unfortunately, as rebellious as he wanted to be, there were inherent difficulties in living away from his father/drug dealer. Since he couldn’t go to the corner drugstore and get his prescription filled eventually he’d have to tell the man his location for medicine delivery.

  “Wednesday, take it or not.” He knew the first rule in dealing with shape shifters. Never show weakness even if you were about to piss in your shoes.

  “I’ll take it.”

  “Good.” James hoped he hid his relief well. “Do you want to meet here?” He nodded towards the diner. The town wasn’t known for its gourmet cuisine, but the café had a nice solid menu with tasty sandwiches and fries cooked to crispy perfection.

  “Here is fine. Noon. Wednesday. I’ll see you then.”

  James gave Lou a wide smile. “See you then.”

  Determined to leave on a high note, and before the sheriff started to interrogate him, James turned away to limp back home. Luckily in a town this small, he could easily walk from place to place. With his seizures it wasn’t always safe to drive.

  Lou watched the younger man leave until he turned the bend and disappeared. James’ evasiveness triggered the sheriff’s detective instincts. What did the other man have to hide?

  Shrugging it off, Lou headed to the office. One way or another, he’d eventually discover all of James’ secrets. Business was slow in this town. Even other shifters hesitated to cause trouble with a bear for a sheriff, which made his days uneventful and gave him plenty of time to investigate his odd human.

  “Morning, Sheriff.” As he entered the Sheriff’s Department, KC’s pointed face peeked at him over his computer. The fox shifter’s freckled face had its customary wide smile as he greeted his boss. Although a strikingly handsome man, Lou’s bear never showed the least interest in the smaller shifter. There was a fragility to the fox his bear found disturbing, as if beneath the bright smile lived a broken man.

  “Good Morning, KC. Anything I need to worry about?”

  “You mean beside the pretty man with the cane?” KC handed over a cup of black coffee earning a grateful smile from his boss. The department budget didn’t extend to a secretary so Lou, more often than not, made his own black swill. No one in the office called his concoction coffee.

  KC did all the office work. He processed paperwork, updated databases, handled phones, did research and when the whim struck him, made coffee.

  “Doesn’t anyone in this town have anything to do except watch me and James?”

  “Nope. Not when we’ve never seen you interested in anyone before.” The fox gave him a sly smile. “Besides, if you bomb I might ask him out. He’s really cute.”

  For the first time in his life, Lou lost complete control of his bear. A loud roar poured out of his throat, claws ripped through his fingers and fur spouted a thick coat covering his skin. In the far distance he heard a soft noise of fear. The bear snapped his head around to face the sound. Far down below a small man cowered behind his desk.

  Threat.

  The other man threatened to take what was his.

  The bear roared his displeasure.

  “Lou, I didn’t mean it. I didn’t know he was your mate.”

  Mate?

  His mate. Images of James flashed through his mind. The sweet human wouldn’t approve if he ate the other man. With a snarl Lou turned away from the creature behind the desk and lumbered down the hall. With each step he transitioned back from bear to man. Fur coat faded, height shrunk, claws retracted, until he was only a human walking to his office.

  “Nice ass,” KC shouted, giving a wolf whistle.

  “Just for that I’m not apologising.” Lou entered his office, slamming the door behind him. Taking a deep breath he leaned against the door. “Shit, I am so fucked. James is my mate.”

  What was he going to do now?

  Chapter Two

  James stumbled through his apartment doorway leaning heavily on the cane as pain ricocheted through his body. His muscles ached, his bones hurt, and pain seared through his veins like acid. He had to admit the truth, even if only to the spider hovering in the corner of his ceiling—the medicine was no longer working. The dosage he usually took now barely dented the agony.

  From his desk the wooden box called to him.

  Just this once.

  Images of Lou frowning at him with disapproval ran through James’ head. He longed to replace the imaginary disgust with a look of lust, to have someone finally desire him as a man. The drugs whispered a soft song of peace, to feel no pain.

  “Fuck.”

  Like a man in a dream he walked over to the walnut box. Flipping open the metal latches he opened the case with one shaking hand, the other one gripping his cane with a white-knuckled hold.

  Taking a deep breath, he gave into the inevitable. He couldn’t continue this way. After suffering his way to his twenties, he’d had enough.

  He pushed the syringe into the liquid vial and drew back the plunger, watching with a dry mouth as the drug was sucked into the glass tube.

  “Sorry, Lou,” he whispered. He imagined the bear shifter’s disappointment as he plunged the syringe into his arm. He barely removed the needle before the drugs took effect.

  Too much. This time something went wrong. Instead of the sweet rush of relief, it felt like fire ants were crawling across his skin, biting him with their fiery sting. His body convulsed, his bones crackled and as white noise filled his ears, James’s eyes rolled into the back of his head and he tumbled to the floor.

  * * * *

  KC rushed into Lou’s office. “Sheriff, you need to get to the hospital. His landlady called and said he overdosed.”

  “What?”

  “They’ve sent him to the local hospital but it looks pretty bad.”

  “I’m on my way.” Lou brushed past the fox shifter without another word. He was halfway to the hospital in his sheriff’s truck before he took a breath. Fear filled him like an icy storm, chilling his soul as he drove towards the hospital with unseemly speed. What could’ve happened between dining at the café and going to his apartment?

  James didn’t strike him as the suicidal type. It could only be an accident.

  Please be an accident.

  Shit. He finally found his mate only to fall for a drug addict. There had to be a different explanation. Thinking back during his experience in the bigger cities, Lou couldn’t equate James’ behaviour to drug addicts he’d dealt with before in the line of duty, but then some people hid their symptoms we
ll.

  His heart sped up when the hospital came into view. Sweat dampened his palms. The hospital valet prudently stepped to the side when Lou came to a screeching halt in front of the patient valet parking sign. Throwing his keys towards the young man he rushed inside. He didn’t have time to talk. He needed to get to James.

  The nurse at the counter was a deer shifter he went to high school with.

  “Hey, Darlene.”

  “Your mate’s in room one-o-three.” She gave him a sympathetic smile. “KC called ahead.”

  Thank God for KC.

  Lou rushed down the hall and slid to a halt in the doorway. Catching a glimpse of his mate, he grabbed the sides of the doorframe. The metal frame screeched as his fingers pressed into it, creating dents. James lay in the hospital bed, still as death. A doctor hovered beside him looking at the monitor. For the first time since he met James, the overpowering scent of medicine was gone.

  He smelt divine.

  “Hey, Sheriff.” Dr Henrickson looked up at his entry. He was a grey-haired mink shifter who ran the hospital ever since Lou could remember. He nodded towards the patient. “I heard he’s yours.”

  “Word gets around. What did he take? Crack? Ecstasy? Overdose on prescription drugs?”

  The doctor shook his head. “That’s the interesting part. It’s a suppressant.”

  “A what?”

  “A drug to prevent shifting.”

  “Into what?”

  Henrickson’s gaze went to the man on the bed. “I don’t know. Did he say anything to you?”

  “He thinks he has Rheumatoid Arthritis.”

  “Ahh. I’m willing to bet he’s only a half shifter then. A full-blooded shifter would’ve changed before now even with the medication. Someone convinced him along the way that he was sick instead of telling him what he really is. I’d bet on one of his parents. I’ve seen a few cases in my time but nothing this extreme. If he really is your mate, it was probably meeting you that set him off.”

  Guilt ate at Lou. He had driven the other man to drugs, even if he’d done it inadvertently. Meeting his mate could’ve killed James.

  The doctor continued to drone on unaware of the affect he had on Lou. “More than likely, his shifter blood saved him. The enzymes in his blood repaired most of the damage when he went into shock. Unfortunately, if he’s been on these drugs since he first showed signs of shifting we’re looking at ten, fifteen years of addiction. His heart might not be able to take the shock of stopping cold turkey.”

  “What if we ease him off them until we can get him to shift?”

  “That’s assuming he can change. A half shifter might not have the ability. He could be on the drugs to stop his body from tearing itself apart. I’ve heard of a few cases where a half-breed turned himself inside out. Some things you can’t recover from even with shifter blood. We need to find out where he got his drugs and why before we try to cut him off or find a better solution. The biggest problem we have is getting his cooperation.”

  “Oh, he’ll cooperate.” Lou had waited his entire life for this man. He wasn’t going to lose him now.

  A sharp rasping cough drew his attention away from the doctor and back to the bed. James’ eyes fluttered open. A glowing ring of gold surrounded his normally medium brown irises.

  “Did I miss our date?” James’ voice sounded sandpaper rough, completely unlike his usual smooth tones.

  “Can he have some water?” Lou asked the doctor.

  “Just a little. I’ll have the nurse bring him some ice chips.”

  Lou rushed to get the small cup. Supporting his mate’s head he titled a little water into James’ mouth. “Drink, honey.”

  Quickly swallowing, the smaller man took down what he could before Lou removed the cup. When he licked the water from his lips, Lou flushed as he thought of the other things the sweet man could lick. Shit, there was something wrong with lusting after a man lying in a hospital bed.

  “Thanks,” he whispered, giving Lou a grateful look.

  “Where did you get the pills?” He didn’t beat around the bush. The doctor needed to know.

  “What pills?”

  “Your medication. You overdosed on pills.”

  James shook his head, his pallor competing with the whiteness of the pillowcase. “It wasn’t the pills. It was a shot. When the pain is too much I take the shot.”

  The light went on in Lou’s head. “That’s why you said we couldn’t get together. You knew the shot would affect you.”

  A careful head nod was his response. “The shot usually knocks me out for a few hours and makes me loopy the day after.”

  Henrickson jumped into the conversation. “Have you ever gone into shock before?” Lou hadn’t even noticed the doctor had returned.

  “No, like I said they always knock me out and make me loopy but I’ve never had this bad of a reaction before. I noticed recently the pills are becoming less effective so I took the shot. I don’t take it very often but I really needed it today.” Sweat beaded James’ forehead and his breath came in shaky gasps. “I need my medication.”

  “No!” Lou gripped James’ hand, drawing his attention. “You need to stop fighting it. You need to embrace what you are.”

  Lou watched closely as Henderson pushed a syringe into the IV.

  “What are you giving him?”

  “A sedative to calm him. If he becomes stressed the adrenalin will hit his system and trigger his symptoms.”

  “Lou.”

  He turned at the panicky tone in James’ voice.

  James frowned at him, a deep furrow forming on his pain-filled face. “What’s going on?”

  Fuck. He hadn’t planned to break it to him this way. “The doc thinks you’re a shifter. The medicine you’re on is an anti-shifting medicine.” Lou swallowed, trying to get moisture to his desert-dry throat. “Would you let doc do some genetic testing? He thinks you might have a parent who has shapeshifting blood.”

  Fear filled his mate’s eyes. “I can’t be a shifter.”

  Lou released the other man’s hand, taking a step back from the bed. “Why not?”

  “My father despises them. He heads an agency opposing shifters. Shit. That’s why he gave me the medication. My mother must’ve been a shifter.”

  “Or your father is one and hates it. I’ve met a few of those myself.” He didn’t mention they usually went crazy and killed themselves. James was already shaking his head.

  “No. He never talks about my mother. It explains so much about my childhood.” An expression of utter defeat crossed James’ face. “I’m tired. I just want to sleep.” He closed his eyes, shutting out the other men.

  “Oh, no, you don’t.” Lou gripped James’ chin, turning him towards him. “You don’t get to ignore me. Dr Henrickson thinks cutting you from your medication will kill you. I’m going to go back to your apartment to get it. Where do you keep your drugs?”

  James reluctantly opened his eyes. “On my side table in the walnut box. The liquid medication and my few remaining pills are there. I was going to contact my father to get more. So I don’t have RA?”

  “I don’t know, love. We won’t know until the doc runs some tests on your blood work and examines your medication. Will you let him?”

  “No. My father will find out. He probably already knows I’m here.”

  “No,” Henrickson denied. “We’re privately funded and not in the medical network. It keeps the privacy of the shifters. Many of them don’t want their employers to know they can shift or people to know where they are. We are champions of staying off the grid.”

  “Good. I’m tired.”

  “Get some rest. We can talk tomorrow.” Lou gave James’ hand a gentle squeeze before standing up and following the doctor into the hall.

  “What do you think he is?” Lou asked as soon as they were out of James’ hearing.

  “From my observation I’d say he’s a big cat of some kind.”

  “I think he might be a lion.” He exp
lained about his encounter with James earlier. “I should have Talan talk to him. Maybe he could go stay with the pride for a while. Learn about the cats. I don’t like him living alone without any support.”

  The doctor gave his a sly smile. “You could stay with him.”

  Lou laughed. “He’s going through enough crap right now without dealing with a new mating and from what you said close contact with me could aggravate his problems.”

  “You think Talan will take him in?”

  Lou nodded. “Yeah, if I tell him the situation I’m sure of it. He’s a good guy for an alpha and his pack is pretty laid back.”

  “Very well. Get his medication and I’ll see if I can figure out a duplicate. I have a little anti-shifter medication but I have a feeling he’s on a much more specialised drug. I’m going to have him continue his pills but leave off the shots until I have them analysed by a chemist friend of mine. I’m also going to give you a prescription for a sedative to knock him out if he starts losing control. We can only hope living with the cats will trigger his shifting instincts. He can’t continue as he has been. Our ultimate goal is to wean him off the drugs completely and have him shift, because the way he is going now, eventually the drugs will kill him. It’s a miracle he’s survived this long.”

  Lou looked back at the frail man on the sterile white bed. If he never saw his mate in a hospital bed again it would be too soon. No way would he let James drift away. The man was his and once they got everything straightened, Lou would stake his claim.

  * * * *

  James didn’t know how he ended up heading towards the Pride lands. After a few days in the hospital and innumerable tests, he finally got clearance to leave his hospital bed. As soon as the doctor discharged him, the sheriff scooped him up and put him in his truck.

  “I still don’t know why we’re going to the Pride house.” His heart beat like a frightened bird in his chest as he thought of confronting the big cat leader. The last time he’d seen Talan it was after the lion’s mate killed another wolf. Even though intellectually he knew he had nothing to worry about since the lions had never been anything but nice to him. Instinct compelled him to fear the large lion despite his apparent easy-going nature.